Holiday Wishes

Kwanza

Christmas

                                                                  Chanukah
 Whichever holiday you celebrate, may you find peace and joy on these sacred days and may you enjoy a happy, healthy stress-free 2023.

Books of November

 Signal Fires. An emotional family story about an unspoken secret that affects the lives of each famly member.  Highly recommended.

Spelling Bee for Grown-ups

West University Senior Spelling Bee, November 23, 2022

As soon as my daughter saw this event on the West U schedule, she called and offered to sign me up.  I said okay. I figured I was a shoo-in.  After all, I've been writing for years and I can spell any word included in Harlequin romance novels.

 The contest was scheduled at 12:30 on the day before Thanksgiving.  I imagine this was because seniors leave the cooking to their children, so they aren't very busy and this gives us something to do while everyone else is preparing the next day's meal.

Alas, I bombed out on my first word:  "bouillon."  Who knows how to spell that?

Luckily, there were two more rounds and I won the second with such words as 
?hiatus," "pneumonia," "cliche" (Any romance writer would know that one.) and "municipality." Not to brag, but I could spell everyone else's words, too.\

If I knew how to transfer a picture from my phone to my computer, I would include the one of the sash and crown I received as well as a prize--a book of stamps.  

The bee was great fun and after it was over, I took my daughter to lunch.  I plan to compete again next year.

I think a spelling bee at Brazos Towers would be a good idea for 2023.

Kindness (Coninued)

Two more examples of kindness:

I recently received a message from a parent whose son I worked with some years ago, letting me know how well he was doing in school.  She said she wasn't sure I'd remember him, but I did.  (I remember almost all of the children I saw for speech therapy...and that's a lot of kids.)O
 

I am often asked to visit with speech pathology majors or recent graduates.  I'm always happy to meet with them.  Occasionally I'm also asked to talk to aspiring writers, and I enjoy doing that as well.

Books of October

 The Marriage Portrait.  My favorite book so far this year.  Inspired by Robert Browning's poem "My Last Duchess" and bolstered by extensive research, Maggie O'Farrell, author of Hamnet, has created a story about the young duchess married to a ruthless duke, who only wants a wife to give birth to an heir.

Hidden Pictures.  A recovering addict is given a chance a redemption when she gets a job a nanny to five-year-old Teddy who loves to draw.  When his pictures become frightening, she wonders if his drawings are inspired by the ghost of a woman who died in the guest house where the nanny is living.  You would really have to suspend your disbelief to "get" this story.  C+

Kindness Project (continued)

Two more examples of kindness I have experienced:

Gayle, who managed our office at Associated Speech and Language Services was one of the kindest people I've known..  She always made clients and their kids feel welcome and became friends with many of the parents.  She was willing to listen, both to clients and to me.  Whenever a deadline of some sort came up, she'd always say gently, "I'm reminding you that..."  She drove me home once when I had an attack of diverticulitis and even made a trip back to the office late one evening from her home near Galveston to return my car keys she'd accidentally picked up.  I always enjoyed our birthday dinners at the Saltgrass Steakhouse and miss her now that she's moved back home to Seattle.

A few weeks ago I was at the checkout counter at Kroger's paying for a 14 pound box of cat litter when the woman behind me said that she and her daughters would be happy to help me load my groceries into my car.  Not only that, but they offered to follow me home and carry the groceries inside.  What a good deed!
 

Kindness Project (continued)

 Continuation of acts of kindness I have received, given or observed:

After my husband died, Michelle Lynn, a speech pathologist colleague, sent me a book titled "Healing After Loss"  that contained daily readings to comfort someone grieving a loss.  I read each day's entry and found it so comforting that I've sent copies of the book to family or friends who have suffered a loss of someone dear.  I will never forget Michelle's act of kindness.

Coffee ice cream is my comfort food.  When I mentioned to my doctor during the pandemic that HEB was out of it and of course, I couldn't go out to other stores to look for any, she stopped by on her way to run errands with two pints of Hagen Daz coffee.  That made my day!

The Kindness Project continued

 As I wrote several weeks ago, the Kindness Project pairs seniors with college freshman.  We are asked to think of ten examples of kindness we have received, given or observed--one each week of the project.  

 I met Marilyn at a romance writers' meeting.  We both became part of a critique group composed of six aspiring romance writers.  Soon Marilyn and I became close friends.   Here  are two of her many acts of kindness toward met:

Several days before my husband died, he had to have his will notarized--I can't recall why he hadn't done so before.  The notary from my attorney's office came to the hospital and explained to Ralph what was needed.  Marilyn had just stepped into the room for a brief visit before she and I were to go to dinner.  Ralph was woozy and weak when the notary handed him the document.  Marilyn, an  occupational therapist, noticed his difficulty with the pen and said, "Here, Ralph, let me position your hand."  She essentially guided him through his signature.  I have never forgotten this act of kindness.

Two years ago, I had major surgery. Marilyn heard about my operation through a mutual friend.  By then she had moved to Portland, Oregon, but she called and offered to come to Houston to take care of me.  Although I was getting along well, I am forever grateful for her offer.

Books of September

 The Things We Cannot Say:  This story alternates between the past and the present.  Alina, a young girl in war-torn Poland, and her fiance Thomaz, yearn to escape their country but circumstances intefere.  Eventually, Alina is able to make her way across the Russian border, but she must leave her lover behind.  In present day America, Alina, now known as Hannah, is dying but she begs her granddaughter Alice to go to Poland and find Thomaz.  Alice has her own problems, a shaky marriage, a non-verbal autistic son and an academically advanced daughter, but she makes it her mission to travel to Poland, and there she uncovers the story of her grandmother's early life.  In turns heartwarming and heartbreaking, this is a memorable story.

Carrie Soto is Back:  I am a tennis fan, so when I saw a book about a former tennis star making a comeback, trying to break her own winning Grand Slam record, I thought, "This is a book for me."  Alas, no.  The main character is unlikeable, and we are treated to every move, every thought in every tennis match in the story.  If you lke to read the details of every ball toss, every serve, lob, volley, down-the-line or cross court return, you might like this book.  I love watching tennis, but reading about every point bored me out of my mind.  Does Carrie win another Grand Slam?  Who cares?

We Remember Them

Monday evening is the beginning of Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, the holiest day in the Jewish calendar.  It is a time to ask forgiveness for our sins and also a time to remember those loved ones who are no longer with us.  This poem encapsulates our feelings for those who were with us in life and whom we remember in death.

In the rising of the sun and in its going down, we remember them.

         In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter, we remember them.

       In the opening of buds and in the rebirth of spring, we remember them.

       In the blueness of the sky and in the warmth of summer, we remember them.

      In the rustling of leaves and in the beauty of autumn, we remember them.

     In the beginning of the year and when it ends, we remember them.

     When we are weary and in need of strength, we remember them.

     When we are lost and sick at heart, we remember them.

     When we have joys we yearn to share, we remember them.

     So long as we live, they too shall live for they are now a part of us, as we 

           remember them.

     

     

       

           

 

The Kindness Project

 I have volunteered to be part of the Kindness Project, sponsored by the southeast Houston Community College, which pairs freshman students in their Honors College with senior citizens to spend one hour a week for ten weeks in conversation.  One of the responsibilities of the seniors is each session to relate an example of kindness they have given, received or observed.  Here are my first two examples:

When I was working full time and taking night classes at UH, I experienced an act of kindness I've never forgotten.  One evening after class my car died at the corner of Scott and McGregor, the worst place I could think of to be stranded alone at night.  I managed to maneuver the car into a service station, which was closed for the night.  Here I was in those pre-cell phone days in a dark parking lot.  I had no choice but to scurry over to the pay phone near the station's door and call my husband to come and get me.  As I turned back to my car, a young boy of around twelve or thirteen appeared beside me.  "Are you okay, lady?" he asked.  I told him what had happened, and he said, "I'll stay with you till your husband gets here", and he did.  He stood by the car window and we talked; I can't remember what we chatted about, but his company made me feel safe.  I offered him some money, but he refused.  He said he was just being nice.  When I thought of acts of kindness, his was the first that came to mind.

When I was a junior in college, my dress caught fire from a gas heater and I spent three months in John Sealy Hospital in Galveston being treated for third degree burns.  When I was finally discharged after being confined to bed for all those weeks, my hair had grown long, thick and tangled.  My best friend Sonia's mother came over one afternoon and cut my hair.  I remember sitting in front of the mirror in my blue and white checked nightgown and watching clumps of hair fall to the floor.  That act of kindness made me feel almost well gain.  That's another experience of kindness I've never forgotten.

To be continued...

Books of August

 

River of Power.  The search for the source of the White Nile and the men involved.  Interesting!

The Last White Man.  I heard the author speak at InPrint and immediately bought the book.  What happens across a city when people begin turning "dark"?  Interesting concept but I have never ever read a book in which every sentence is at least one page long.  I got so stuck on the author's style that I couldn't concentrate on the story, which was okay because it was boring.  Not recommended, unless you enjoy counting words in each sentence.

Prayer for Friendship by John O'Donahue

   May you be blessed with good friends,

                                               And learn to be a good friend to yourself

                                          Journeying to that place in your soul where

                                         There is love, warmth and feeling.

                                        May this change you.

                                        May it transfigure what is negative, distant.

                                       Or cold within your heart.

                                      May you be brought into real passion, kindness

                                     And belonging.

                                     May you treasure your friends,

                                    May you be good to them, be there for them

                                   And receive all the challenges, truth and light you need.

                                   May you never be isolated, but know the embrace

                                  Of your anam cara.   (soul friend)

                                        

         

 

 

Groups:

All my life I have found groups to belong to, from Brownies to Bingo.

I became a Brownie in second grade, wearing my brown, starched uniform and my cute brown beanie and learning to recite the Brownie promise and to make the Brownie sign. I don’t remember what we did during our weekly meetings but we always ended by standing in a circle and singing Taps.

Later my friend’s mother organized a Girl Scout troop that met weekly at thier house. Now we had green uniforms and hats and needed three fingers for the Girl Scout sign. I was secretary of the troop and called everyone on Monday evenings to remind them of our Tuesday meetings. By junior high some girls had lost interest in scouts but a core group of about ten of us remained.  We had a wonderful Scout leader named Anne, who invited all of us to her wedding. 

Also In junior high, a group of seven girls met every Saturday afternoon.  We called ourselves Tri-S for Seven Saturday Sisters. We played board games, played outside, went to movies. We had fun.

In high school I belonged to a group called the Confederate Club It was the brainchild of Don H. who loved the Old South. Can you imagine a public school today allowing a group that paid homage to the Old South?  A close-knit bunch, we had our own special horn honk when we drove up to one another’s houses.  On Friday nights we went to football games together and afterwards rode around in Don’s station wagon.  If you were the first ones to get in, you could sit at the back with the rear door open and dangle your feet outside.  That, of course, was long before seat belts.  For the spring parade we built a float that displayed a huge mint julep.  I wore a red bathing suit and sat on the top.  I needed a ladder to get up there.  A Confederate flag flew from the station wagon antenna.    My sister likes to remind me of my membership in the Confederate Club.  She knows it makes me cringe, but it was great at the time.  We didn’t know any better.

In college I pledged Sigma Delta Tau sorority, founded by seven Cornell University students whose names we had to learn, but were easy to remember in order because their first initials spelled out DAMGIRLs. I was the chapter secretary my junior year. I loved my SDT friends. 

.

After I graduated and got married, I joined the Emma Lazarus chapter of Houston Hadassah.  It was for young women and at age 35, you had to join another chapter. (By the time I reached that old age, I had left Hadassah behind and was pursuing my Master’s in speech pathology). But in the early days of marriage, my life had revolved around Emma Lazarus meetings and fund raisers.  One of my jobs was to be in charge of sales of Barton’s candy for Chanukah and the candy became so popular that the manager of the apartment complex we lived in would give me an empty apartment to store the candy shipments.  Lori, by then around 3 years old, liked to get out her toy telephone and say, “Hello, can you come to the ‘Dassah meeting?”  And yes, I served a stint as secretary to the chapter.

During my ‘Dassah days my husband and I lived at Braesfield apartments, 3822 North Braeswood.  That complex was demolished but in those days it was a chic place for young married couples with children, and there were lots of us.  The girls played bridge, went downtown for lunch at Foley’s or Sakowitz on Fridays when our maids came, took our children to the pool or for special dinners at a hamburger place in Westbury Square.  In the evenings when our husbands were home, we’d all gather in the courtyard, talk and laugh.  Eventually we bought our first homes and moved on.

When I gave up Hadassah for speech therapy, I hung out with other grad students and later when I worked at the Speech and Hearing Institute, with colleagues there. At lunch we watched Jeaopardy, we went to Texas Speech and Hearing conferences together and lobbyed  the Texas legislature for licensure for speech pathologists.  After I started a private practice, I became active in the Houston Association for Communication Disorders and the Texas Speech and Hearing Association.  One year  I was co-chair for TSHA’s Parents’ Night at the annual convention.  Our job was to schedule a speaker for the event.  We tried in vain to get Anne Glenn, wife of John Glenn.  Anne was a stutterer and we thought she’d be a big draw.  Unfortunately, she turned us down.  Later I was, of course, secretary of the Texas Speech and Hearing Foundation and those of us on the board became close friends.  We sponsored an awards dinner at the yearly TSHA convention and the year I was in charge, I also won the door prize.  I promise, the drawing was not a set-up. 

Even though my life revolved around my family—husband and three teenage children—I found time for a new interest and a new group. After reading a book called Wishcraft:  How to Get What You Really Want, I decided I really wanted to write a romance novel.  My first step was to join Romance Writers of America. I wondered somewhat nervously about the people I would meet. .  Would the members be silver-haired ladies nostalgic about their long ago love affairs, or perhaps glamorous middle aged women who wore silky negligees as they reclined on lounge chairs and dictated sexy stories to their secretaries?  Maybe they would be poverty-stricken young women who sat at their kitchen tables typing at old-fashioned typewriters in hopes of making the best seller list.  Since I fit none of those categories, I wondered if I could possibly fit in.  I found a group of average women, all of them unpublished but hoping for sales.  In time, I joined a critique group with five other aspiring romance writers.  We met every Friday night. 

After I became a member of a group I never wanted to join, The Society of the Recently Widowed, a chance purchase of a book about women transitioning to a new stage of life, brought me to TTN, The Transition Network.  What luck!  These were interesting women moving to new stages of life.  We met monthly, formed a discussion group called Death, Dying and Dessert to discuss end of life issues, and published an anthology titled Coping with Transition:  Men, Money, Motherhood and Magic.

  Another speical group is the Friends of Marilyn.  When our dear friend Marilyn moved to Portland, Oregon, four of us  drove her to the airport to say goodbye.  Now we meet each year on July 5, Marilyn’s birthday,, for a phone call or a Zoom meeting to catch up. 

I belong to other groups as well:  a monthly group of speech pathologists (Speech Ladies’ Lunch) a group that goes to dinner and InPrint readins together, a group of retired speech pathologists that celebrates one another’s birthdays, a canasta group, a bereavement group that became a lunch group that turned into a Mah Jongg group that formed a daily Zoom group that got us through the dark days of the pandemic.  And there’s the Bingo Bunch, about 20 Brazos Towers Residents that play high stakes Bingo ($1.25 a card) on Saturdays nights.   And, oh yes, a group of reisdents, one of whom is a film critic, is organizing a movie group, The Brazos Towers Movie Mob.  That should be fun.

And of course, there is our memoir group, who encourage one another to write about past experiences, hopes and dreams, tragedies and triumphs.  I look forward to our Tuesday meeetings.  We never know what gems will emerge.

Groups have inspired me, supported me, opened me to new ideas and experiences and enriched my life.  I’m  forever grateful that I found these friends.

 

Insults

 Note:  These are from the era before the English language got boiled down to four-letter words:

He has delusions of adequacy.  by Walter Kerr

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.  by Winston Churchill

I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.  Clarence Darrow.

He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.  William Faulkner about Ernest Hemingway.

Poor Faulkner.  Does he really think big emotions come from big words?  Ernest Hemingway about William Faulkner

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book.  I'll waste no time reading it. Moses Hadas

I didn't attend the funeral but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.  Mark Twain

He has no enemies but is intensely disliked by his friends.  Oscar Wilde

I am enclosing two tickets to my new play; bring a friend if you have one.  George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

Couldn't possibly attend first night, will attend second...if there is one.  Chaurchill's response to Shaw.

I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.  Stephen Bishop

He is a self-made man and worships his creator.  John Bright

I've just learned about his illness.  Let's hope it's nothing trivial.   Irvin Cobb

He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.  Samuel Johnson

Books of July

 A Gracious Neighbor inspired by the short story "A Jury of Her Peers," but not nearly as good.  I read it because it's set in West U.  The main character is constantly upset because her house is small and she doesn't fit in with the West U crowd.  And then an old friend from high school and her husband move in next door and now she's obsessed with them. Not recommended.

This Time Tomorrow.  On her fortieth birthday our heroine wakes up to find herself 16 again.  If you're into time traveling, this may be a book for you.  If not, don't bother.

Dark Money.  How the Koch brothers have influenced American politics and culture.

Portrait of an Unknown Woman.  Every year I swear I will not read another of Daniel Silva's books about Israeli spy and art restorer Gabriel Allon, and every year I read the newest one.  They're like ice cream; I can't resist them.  This one was better than last year's.  Gabriel is now retired from The Office, the Israeli spy headquarters, but he becomes involved in catching a ring of art forgers. As usual, he finds the bad guys.

Life's Edge.  A book about trees, genes, slime molds (my favorite chapter) and other plants and animals very different from those we know about.  Very interesting.

s

Washington Post Annual Contest: Funny!

 

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words. The winners are:

 

1. Coffee (N.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (V.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (V.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (Adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (Adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (V.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (N.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (N.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (N.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (N.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (N.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon , a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (N.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (N.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (N.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

 

 

My Forever Home

 

I'm not sure if it was fate or just plain luck that I opened an invitation to a lunch to hear about a new senior living facility that was going up not far from my Meyerland home.  Senior living for me?  Living with a bunch of doddering old people?  I was still working, writing, driving, volunteering...but I had nothing planned for that day and besides, it was a free lunch.  Sure enough, when I walked in, I saw gray-haired people, some with rollators.  I couldn't possibly fit in.  But the meal was delicious, the marketing pitch intriguing and the new addition wouldn't be open for two years.  Plenty of time to think about it.

I thought about moving, visited several other senior living places and made the best decision of my life...well, of my elderly life.  I put down a deposit for a two-bedroom apartment at the future building and starting planning my move.

I know many people detest the idea of moving into "one of those places,."  but for me, it's been a pleasure.  One secret is to move before you have to, before you're too frail to partake of the activities and become part of the community.  There's lots to do here--a gym, exercise classes, a book club, bridge groups, Mah Jongg groups, Bingo, canasta, movies a bar, discussion groups, trips to museums, theaters and restaurants, speakers, performers, sing alongs--you name it.  We have it.  Of course, you choose the activities that appeal to you or no activities at all.  Brazos Towers is a friendly, welcoming community with lots of vibrant, interesting residents.  It's also a Continuum of Care community with a health center, assisted living and memory care when required.  We have valet service, transportation, housecleaning, maintenance.  All those pesky things you had to keep up your house are no longer necessary.  We even have a garden with space for residents to do their own planting.  See...you don't have to give up your yard; you just have to enjoy the outdoors.  Senior living is safe.  It's secure and in flood-prone Houston, we survived Harvey while watching the bayou across the street rise over its banks.

I've written about Brazos Towers because that's my forever home now, but most senior living spaces are similar and now, with an aging population, there are many to choose from.  I love where I live.  Visit a few, take a tour and don't be afraid to make the leap into a new stage of life.  Being here is sort of like high school.  We're high schoolers with wrinkles.

Books of May and June

 Rivers of Power is a long book about the effect of rivers on human populations.  It's not for everyone (unless you're interested in rivers) but I enjoyed it.

The Woman with the Blue Star.  A Polish Jewish family manages to escape from the Nazis and hide in the sewers.  Amid the sorrows, the daughter finds an unlikely friend, a Polish girl she glimpses through  a grate over the sewer. 

Meditating

                                      Written during the pandemic but still applicable.

What if we see the pandemic

As a hard blessing

and a cue to reflect

That truly

Life is beautiful

And we need to see ourselves

As family

Without distinction

And love each other

And learn to give tenderness,

What if we learn to love

Our Mother Earth

And take care of ourselves

And take care of her.

What if in our isolation

We learn to listen to each other

With understanding

And look with wonder at every pebble

Every shadow.

What if we marvel

At the sunset,

At the song of a bird

And a droplet of water

And what if we listen

With a new ear to the children

And the elders.

And what if we search inside ourselves

And realize

We actually don't need a lot,

That the ultimate beauty

Is what we now miss so much--

To hug,

To look into each other's eyes

That we really lack for nothing.

 

What Musical Notes Can Teach Us

 C sharp = D flat

Yesterday I attended a memorial service for a well-loved resident here at Brazos Towers.  A comment from the eulogy caught my attention and has stayed in my mind ever since.  The comment had to do with piano keys, that C sharp and D flat are the same key on the piano, the same pitch but are inscribed differently on sheet music so we tend to think of them as different.  The minister pointed out that, as human beings we're really all alike, all homo sapiens, though we think of each other as different.  He reminded us that all faiths tell us to love our neighbors as ourselves and said we should keep that in mind when we encounter people who think differently from us.  That's a perfect lesson for today:  Democrat/Republican;  Jew/Christian/ Muslim;  liberal/conservative--we're all members of the human race who should treat one another with courtesy and respect.  

For Wordle Lovers

Josh Wardle, the inventor of the hit word game, Wordle, has been named one of Time Magazine's 100 most influential people.  Here is an article about Wordle from the New York Times written (Wordle addicts will appreciate this) only in five-letter words.

Today.

Alarm.

Arise.

Teeth: brush, floss.

Grabs phone.

Loads.  Rules clear.

Legit words. Slang]

taboo.

Ready? Ready.

Plays.

Picks usual first guess.

Sonar?  Cable? Novel?

Share?

Ashen block after

ashen block.

Lucky!

Clues, Hints.

Tries again.

Fifth space, amber

(maybe lemon?)

Right vowel, wrong 

place.

Tries again.

Three right!

First, green,  Third, 

green.  Fifth, amber

(maybe lemon)

Brain stirs.

Words. Order. Usage.

Logic.

Tries again.  Worse!

Feels faint.  Think!

Needs quiet,

Fights doubt.

Avoid doing badly.

Tries again.

Wrong!

Shock, truly

Stuck.

Brain blank.

Sharp panic.

Takes pulse.

Keeps faith.

Brain spark; vowel

twice?

Final guess.

Every fiber tense.

Waits.

First block flips.

Green,

Green, green, green.

Bliss!

Alive again!

Prize, pride,

Inner peace,

Waits.

Night alarm, teeth,

phone, newly blank 

board.

First guess again.

Final point:

minor thing, major\

magic.

Daily light among

bleak times.

Happy place.

Hence,

folks thank

Josh Wardle.

If  you play Wordle, you know exactly how this feels.

By the way,  I've gotten 127 out of 131 correct!  (Happy place!)

If you're a wordle enthusiast, you'll enjoy Canada's game, Canuckle--just like Wordle, but each correct word has something to do with Canada.

folks thank

 

Making Sense of Today's World

 Amid the chaos and confusion and divisions of today's world, I read an article in the June 4, 2022 issue of Slate Magazine by Dahlia Lithwick entitled "Why Politics is Both the Poison and the Cure."  She, too, was trying to put the events of today's world in perspective.  She quoted comments of Howard Zinn that seemed to me to sum up our present dilemma and how to cope with it:

"To be hopeful in bad times is not just foolishly romantic.  It is based on the fact that human history is not only a history of cruelty but also of compassion, sacrifice, courage, kindness. What we choose to emphasize in this complex history will determine our lives.  If we see only the worst, it destroys our capacity to do something.  If we remember those times and places--and there are so many--where people have behaved magnificently, this gives us the energy to act and at least the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction. And if we do act, in however small a way, we don't have to wait for some grand utopian future.  The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory."

Do You Know These Words?

The way it smells after rain is called petrichor.

                                  The space between your eyebrows is called a glabella/

                          The coating at the end of your shoelaces is called an aglet.

                                       The rumbling of a stomach is called a wamble.

                                        The cry of a newborn is called a vagitus.

                                              The prongs on a fork are called tines.

                                                       (I knew this one.)

                                      Your tiny toe or finger is called a minimus

Only in This World

Only in this world do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in this world do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions  while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in this world do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a diet Coke.

Only in this world do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in this world do we have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Books of April

 The Golden Couple.  Pretty good thriller about a couple visiting an unorthodox therapist.\\

Heiresses.  Non-fiction book about famous heiresses from women kidnapped for money in the 18th century to  millionaire women of today, some happy but most not, inspite of their wealth.

The Thursday Murder Club.  If you live in a retirement home, are thinking of living in a retirement home, or know someone who lives in a retirement home, trust me, you'll love this story about four seniors who solve murders and who sometimes collaborate with the police and sometimes outwit them, The first of three books so far in this series.

Work Freaks.  I enjoy playing Scrabble...for fun.  This book was written by a reporter who researched professional Scrabble players, most of whom devote their lives (seriously) to memorizing lists of two-letter through10-letter words, play in tournaments and in short, are obsessed with Scrabble.  The author becomes equally obsessed.   

Scrabble Strategy.  Yes, I read this too.  Reading both convinced me that Scrabble is fun but it shouldn't run your life.

The Reading List.  A sweet book about people who discover a list of novels made by an anonymous person and how their lives intersect.  Enjoyable for anyone who likes to read.  And then, you can read all the books on this mysterious list.

The Proust Questionnaire: 35 Questions to Ask Yourself or Another Person

1. What do you consider your greatest achievement?

2. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

3. What is your current state of mind?

4. What is your favorite occupation?

5. What is your most treasured possession?

6. What or who is the greatest love of your life?

7. What is your favorite journey?

8. What is your most marked characteristic?

9. When and where were you the happiest?

10. What is it that you most dislike?

11. What is your greatest fear?

12. What is your greatest extravagance?

13. What living person do you most despise?

14. What is your greatest regret?

15. Which talent would you like to have?

16. Where would you like to live?

17. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

18. What is the quality you like most in a man?

19. What is the quality you like most in a woman?

20. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

21. What is the trait you most deplore in others?

22. What do you most value in your friends?\

23. Who is your favorite hero of fiction?

24/ Who are your heroes in real life?

25. What living person do you most admire?

26. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

27. On what occasions do you lie?

28. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

29. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

30. What are your favorite names?

31. How would you like to die?

32. If you could die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be?

33. Who are your favorite wtiers?

34. What historical figure do you most identify with?

35. What is your motto?

 Note:  Vanity Fair Magazine asks these questions of celebrities.  You can also google some famous people's answers.

Have fun with these.  They will take a long time.

 

For Fun

 

Books of March

 All the Frequent Troubles of Our Days.  A highly recommended book that won the Book Critics' Circle award for non-fiction, it's the story of a young American woman, married to a German and living in Berlin during the rise of Hitler and her involvement in the resistance.  

The Overnight Guest.  A supposed thriller that I forgot as soon as I finished it.  Written in the style of a middle schooler--okay a high schooler--about a woman trapped in a snowstorm who discovers a child in the snow and later an injured woman near a wrecked car.  Secrets are revealed.  Amazon listed this as an editor's pick.  I can't imagine why.

In Love.  A memoir about the author's husband, diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's who decides to end his life at Dignitas in Switzerland.  I didn't have the emotional response I would have expected from this tragic story, but it was interesting.

Did You Ever Wonder Why...?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made from real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitos?

You know that indestructible black box that's used in airplanes?  Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

If "con" is the opposite of "pro," is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
 

Basketball and Life: And My Picks for Oscars.

 

It's March Madness and Houston lost last night.😢

I wil cheer for Saint Peters, this year's Cinderella.

It's also Oscar night.  I have seen most of the Best Picture finalists.  I am hoping for CODA.  If you haven't seen it, you should.  I thought Drive My Car was stupid, Belfast was charming, so was West Side Story.  I didn't like The Power of the Dog.  

My pick for Best Actress is Jessica Chastain and for Best Actor, Will Smith.

We'll see what happens!

Books of February

A slow reading month.  I'm still concentrating on books about Scrabble.  However, I did read one novel:

Harlem Shuffle.  This is Colson Whitehead's latest book. I loved The Nickel Boys, this one not as much.  His writing is always amazing, but I didn't care that much for the story of the owner of a furniture store in Harlem who gets involved in some dirty dealings.
 

The Wisdom of Gandhii

"

 "He who stops to ponder and think will generally come out ahead."

When Gandhi was studying law at University College London, a Caucasian professor , whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely, and always displayed prejudice and animosity towards him.  Also, because Gandhi never lowered his head when addressing him as he expected, there were always arguments and confrontations.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University, and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor.  The professor said, "Mr. Gandhi, you do not understand.  A pig and a bird do not sit together to eat."

Gandhi looked at him as a parents would a rude child and calmly replied, "You do not worry, professor.  I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table.  Mr. Peters, reddened with rage, decided to take revenge on the next test paper, but Gandhi responded brilliantly to all questions.

Mr. Peters, unhappy and frustrated, asked him the following questions.  "Mr. Gandhi, if you were walking down the street and found a package, and within was a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money, which one would you take?"

Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, "The one with the money, of course."

Mr. Peters, smiling sarcastically, said, "I, in your place, would have taken wisdom, don't you think?"

Gandhi shrugged indifferently and responded, "Each one takes what he doesn't have."

Mr. Peters, by this time, was beside himself and so great was his anger that he wrote on Gandhi's exam sheet the word "idiot" and gave it to Gandhi.  Gandhi took the exam sheet and sat down at his desk, trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

A few minutes later, Gandhi got up, went to the professor and said to him in a dignified but sarcastically polite tone, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade.

Wit always wins over anger.

Seven Games

 Just finished a fascinating book by Oliver Roeder about seven games loved by people all over the world:  checkers, chess, backgammon, Go, poker, Scrabble and bridge.  Artificial Intelligence is changing the play of many of these games--game competence, game analysis, human against computer play.  We learn the history of these games, the obsession of the top players, and the attempts to design "perfect" computer programs that are almost impossible to beat.  Also there are some fun facts about each game:

Checkers:  I always thought checkers was a kids' game.  I even had a checkerboard on the linoleum floor of my childhood room.  Actually it's pretty complicated.  When only two checkers are left on the board, there are 7,000 possible moves!  Jonathan Schaeffer spent 18 years of his life designing a computer program called Chinook that would play the perfect checkers game, neglecting his family in the process.

Chess:  Chess and checkers are the only two of the seven games where the players begin with an even playing field.  The game was played across the Christian and Islamic world as early as the twelfth century.  Roeder mentions a legend in which a visiting king inquired, "What is chess?" and the caliph he asked replied, "What is life?" Scientists at the Los Alamos Laboratory designed a computer game of chess in the mid 1950/s.  World chess champion Gerry Kasparov said about the computer chess program Deep Blue, "It plays like God."

Backgammon:  A game in which luck plays a part.  Moves are determined by throwing dice.  A group of Egyptologists discovered an ancient backgammon set dating to the fourth century A.D. in the royal cemetery at qustul.  The game of backgammon can change from one turn to the next, greater than a chess game by a factor of ten.  A computer program created in the 1990's  trained itself to play backgammon by playing and analyzing 300,000 games against itself.

Go: Popular in Asia, Go is extremely complex.  In Japan there are four Go groups.  The game was developed in the seventeenth century.  A game between a Grand Master, described as "the last of the true masters in the tradition of Go as a way of life and art" once played a young prodigy in a game lasting six months.  He lost by five points.  A year later he was dead.

Poker:  The World Series of Poker in Las Vegas attracts thousands of players each year.  Different levels of play require different buy-ins, ranging from $250 to $1,000,000.  Like  backgammon, poker has randomness since cards are drawn from a shuffled deck.  Unlike backgammon, where you can see all your opponents' pieces as well as the roll of the dice, in poker, the opponents' cards are hidden and players attempt to figure out what's in their hands and bet accordingly.  Roeder remarks this is similar to the real world, which often contains many things we would like to know but don't. The Computer Poker Research Group, formed in 1996, has its office at the University of Alberta in Canada.  During World War II, 30 million decks of cards were distributed to troops and most were used in poker games.  Presidential poker enthusiasts have included Franklin Roosevelt, Truman Eisenhower (who won enough money playing poker to buy an engagement ring for Mamie), Nixon and Obama.

Scrabble:   Unlike the other games described in this book, Scrabble was invented in the 20th century during the Depression.  During the first seven letter draw out of a bag containing 100 letter tiles, there are 3, 199,724 possible combinations of letters.  One of the world's best Scrabble players, Nigel Richards, has memorized the entire Scrabble dictionary and if given a random word, can tell what page it is on.  The dictionary contains 107 two-letter words, 1087 threes and 4218 fours.  There are 192,111 words in the entire dictionary.  New words are added when they become commonplace; for instance, "emoji" is now an acceptable word.  Playing a seven-letter word, which gives the player a 50 point bonus, is called a bingo.

Bridge:  Roeder refers to bridge as "a dying game" and remarks that the majority of avid bridge players are middle-aged or older.  He also points out that, of the seven games he discusses, only bridge relies on partners and their ability to communicate with one another.  There is less luck in bridge than in poker, more socialization than in chess and is less stressful than chess.  Losing one hand doesn't end one's chances; the next one may turn out better.  "Bridge, like the real world," says Roeder, "features alliances and discords, deduction and inference.  The game requires memory and wisdom, prudence and risk, and empathy for both friend and foe." He also notes that there are 53 billion billion possible deals of a single hand!

Games are a distinctly human pastime and have been played for hundreds of years.  Roeder's last chapter discusses philosophers' views of why we play games and their importance in our lives.