S is for Quotes about Skipping

It's only a matter of inches, but skipping gets me just that much closer to heaven. ~Terri Guillemets


If you've lost your enthusiasm, there's no better place to find it than on a skipping excursion. And, you might just find your lost youth as well! ~Jessi Lane Adams


  Be a rebel against gravity: Skip! ~Jessi Lane Adams

 

Time sure flies when you skip an hour. ~Jessi Lane Adams


 
 I don't think it's possible to skip with a frown on your face.... I'd like to see the world's governing and terrorist leaders on a skipping tour through the Middle East and across the subcontinent and China to Korea. ~Sue Irwin, courtesy of iSkip.com

Skip like the wind! ~Author Unknown


You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again. ~Jean-Jacques Rousseau


  Skipping is a form of flying. ~Jessi Lane Adams


With all its ups and downs, skipping is just one more metaphor for life. ~Terri Guillemets Skipping: a joyful impulse, stunted at puberty. ~M. Robin D'Antan


  Skipping is oxygen for the soul. ~Jessi Lane Adams Skipping is nature's antidepressant. ~Jessi Lane Adams


If you're enjoying your depression, then for goodness sake do not go skipping. ~Jessi Lane Adams


  Skipping exercises your happiness muscles. ~Terri Guillemets



 

  Skipping is the walk of joy. ~Jessi Lane Adams

 Skipping turns —
moping into hoping,
pity into giddy,
sad into glad,
lazy into crazy,
old into bold,
tired into wired!
~Terri Guillemets


  I like to skip because I can't help but smile when I'm skipping (either I'm too uncoordinated to frown and skip at the same time or else it's a physical impossibility)! ~Nancy, courtesy of iSkip.com

 I'm addicted to this exercise — I never skip a day! ~Jessi Lane Adams


 Skipping arm in arm is double the joy! ~Jessi Lane Adams


   Skipping turns your legs into built-in pogo sticks. ~Jessi Lane Adams


 Skipping subtracts years from your heart, adds joy to your life, multiplies your happiness, and divides your stress. It's a prime exercise, and I count it among one of my greatest blessings. ~Terri Guillemets


  If you are happy, go skipping. If you are sad, go skipping! ~Terri Guillemets


  The pursuit of happiness: skipping is your best chance of catching it. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping is inner joy meets outer joy. ~Jessi Lane Adams


If I were a doctor, skipping would be my number one prescription. ~Jessi Lane Adams


 Jogging is for those who don't have the guts to skip. ~Terri Guillemets


  Skipping: the ultimate display of nonconformity. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Restore your sanity — go skipping like crazy! ~Jessi Lane Adams


Why march to the beat of your own drummer when you can skip? ~Dave May, courtesy of iSkip.com

 

When you take flight by skipping, your baggage gets left behind — there's no room to carry on worries. ~Jessi Lane Adams


When most people see an adult skipping they assume it must be on the way either to or from the asylum. ~Terri Guillemets

 

I like this one best!

It's only a matter of inches, but skipping gets me just that much closer to heaven. ~Terri Guillemets


If you've lost your enthusiasm, there's no better place to find it than on a skipping excursion. And, you might just find your lost youth as well! ~Jessi Lane Adams


I still get wildly enthusiastic about little things.... I play with leaves. I skip down the street and run against the wind. I never water my garden without soaking myself. ~Leo F. Buscaglia, Bus 9 to Paradise


I think skipping could be the answer to many of our adult health problems. ~Jeanne, courtesy of iSkip.com


Be a rebel against gravity: Skip! ~Jessi Lane Adams


I skip to the heartbeat of my angel. ~Terri Guillemets


Time sure flies when you skip an hour. ~Jessi Lane Adams


People ask why I skip and I give the incomparable reason of "why not?" ~Author unknown, courtesy of iSkip.com


Learning to skip has brought control into her life. Whenever she feels at all sad she switches into this wholly happy gait, sliding, hopping, and sliding again; when doing this, it seems as though her head separates from her body, making her feel dizzy and emptied out of bad thoughts. Does anyone else in the world know this trick, she wonders. Probably not, though her mother sometimes waves at her from the window, waves and smiles. ~Carol Shields, The Stone Diaries


Skipping is jumping for joy, step after step. ~Terri Guillemets


I don't think it's possible to skip with a frown on your face.... I'd like to see the world's governing and terrorist leaders on a skipping tour through the Middle East and across the subcontinent and China to Korea. ~Sue Irwin, courtesy of iSkip.com


Skip like the wind! ~Author Unknown


You are worried about seeing him spend his early years in doing nothing. What! Is it nothing to be happy? Nothing to skip, play, and run around all day long? Never in his life will he be so busy again. ~Jean-Jacques Rousseau


Just like yoga, skipping provides exercise for the body, mind, and spirit. ~"Skipper" Kim Corbin, founder of iSkip.com


Skipping is a form of flying. ~Jessi Lane Adams


With all its ups and downs, skipping is just one more metaphor for life. ~Terri Guillemets


Skipping isn't for everyone. Getting out of our comfort zones for a momentary skipping escape takes guts. It is much more difficult than many realize.  Our ego likes to feel in control and is afraid of what others will think.... When we can learn to simply observe our ego's fear and then choose to skip on despite it, we develop the spiritual strength necessary for inner peace.  ~Kim Corbin, founder of iSkip.com


Skipping: a joyful impulse, stunted at puberty. ~M. Robin D'Antan


What a hero Tom was become now! He did not go skipping and prancing, but moved with a dignified swagger as became a pirate who felt that the public eye was on him. ~Mark Twain, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer


Skipping is oxygen for the soul. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping by the flowers,
Skipping around for hours,
Skipping in rain showers —
Skipping has magical powers!
~Jessi Lane Adams


There's another powerful benefit of skipping which is that it adds joy and positive energy to the world. Seeing adults consumed by the joy of skipping sends a compelling message about the power of the spirit over fear. When you learn to turn off your logical mind and get lost in the spirit of skipping, it's like exercising a muscle that will help you deal with other fears. As external events become increasingly intense, that kind of inner strength will be more important than ever. ~Kim Corbin, founder of iSkip.com


If I had time for only two exercises, I would choose yoga and skipping. ~Terri Guillemets


There was a boyishness about Mr. Clemens sometimes that found different modes of expression. Once, when the long corridor of the second floor of the hotel presented a temptingly empty avenue, he hopped, skipped, and ran, and then gave a delicious suggestion of a cake-walk. As soon as a door opened, however, he stopped and assumed a supernaturally grave aspect. ~Elizabeth Wallace, Mark Twain and the Happy Island


Out came the children running.
All the little boys and girls,
With rosy cheeks and flaxen curls,
And sparkling eyes and teeth like pearls,
Tripping and skipping, ran merrily after
The wonderful music with shouting and laughter.
~Robert Browning, "The Pied Piper of Hamelin"


Skipping is nature's antidepressant. ~Jessi Lane Adams


If you're enjoying your depression, then for goodness sake do not go skipping. ~Jessi Lane Adams


SKIPPING! The hippity hoppity gait that came naturally to us as children, but that the majority of adults haven't done since they were ten... SKIPPING! Like Dorothy and gang did arm in arm down the yellow brick road... SKIPPING! As in expressing joy by leaping happily down the street without a care in the world. ~Kim Corbin, founder of iSkip.com


Adults aren't generally struck with the urge to skip because their worries and burdens weigh them down and they forget that they can take themselves lightly. ~Jessi Lane Adams


I skip for that all-over body tickle. ~John Olesen


I have loved skipping since I was a little girl and I have never been able to restrain myself when an open stretch of sidewalk or path beckons me. ~Marelu Marson, courtesy of iSkip.com


Those moments before a poem comes, when the heightened awareness comes over you, and you realize a poem is buried there somewhere, you prepare yourself. I run around, you know, kind of skipping around the house. It's as though I could fly, almost, and I get very tense before I've told the truth — hard. Then I sit down at the desk and get going with it. ~Anne Sexton


The two best things about skipping:
1) It's free.
2) It frees you.
~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping exercises your happiness muscles. ~Terri Guillemets


Skipping is great exercise! It burns twice as many calories as walking. It has less impact on your joints than running. And it is joy-based, unlike running which generates from our fight or flight reflex. ~Kim Corbin, founder of iSkip.com


Skipping is the walk of joy. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping turns —
moping into hoping,
pity into giddy,
sad into glad,
lazy into crazy,
old into bold,
tired into wired!
~Terri Guillemets


And I'll skip to Heaven on my own two feet. ~Terri Guillemets


I like to skip because I can't help but smile when I'm skipping (either I'm too uncoordinated to frown and skip at the same time or else it's a physical impossibility)! ~Nancy, courtesy of iSkip.com


Sometimes I do a little mental skipping, just to shake things up in my mind. ~Jessi Lane Adams


[I]nspiration abounds when I skip and I do feel like a kid again. It frees the cobwebs, stimulates the soul, and enlightens the spirit. ~Nancy, courtesy of iSkip.com


I'm addicted to this exercise — I never skip a day! ~Jessi Lane Adams


You see, Wendy, when the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies. ~James M. Barrie, Peter Pan


We used to fly past shoppers in the town centre and especially in the winter, wrapped up in our duffle coats, woolen hats and scarves we used to get so warm that there would soon be coats unbuttoned, scarves trailing behind and rosy cheeks by the time we got to school. ~Karen Elkins, courtesy of iSkip.com


While the rhythm of running emphasizes a downward motion, the upward motion of skipping defies gravity and elevates my mood in the process. ~Susan Reineck, courtesy of iSkip.com


Skipping arm in arm is double the joy! ~Jessi Lane Adams


When I skip, I have no worries. ~Carolyn Tyler, courtesy of iSkip.com


D'ya ever go for a midnight skip
Or an after-dark skinny dip?
Exercise your inner child at night,
It's twice as fun than in daylight.
~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping chases away the blues, and happiness will come chasing after you. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping turns your legs into built-in pogo sticks. ~Jessi Lane Adams


[Skipping] makes me a kid again — not just feel like a kid — a KID again. ~John-Hans Melcher, courtesy of iSkip.com


Skipping subtracts years from your heart, adds joy to your life, multiplies your happiness, and divides your stress. It's a prime exercise, and I count it among one of my greatest blessings. ~Terri Guillemets


[Skipping] takes me back to less complicated times, without leaving the present! ~Hope Trachtenberg-Fifer, courtesy of iSkip.com


If you are happy, go skipping. If you are sad, go skipping! ~Terri Guillemets


Jump for joy,
Come skip with me.
Don't be coy,
Let's merry be!
~Jessi Lane Adams


The first time she halted by my side for a moment I whispered to her to calm her gushing spirits; not to meddle with her dress; and for public opinion's sake not to step so high. I said she could get over just as much ground at a more moderate gait; and besides the noble Grand Duke her father might happen along at any moment. I might as well have talked to the wind. She only laughed that characteristic laugh of hers, that slivery laugh that I could recognize anywhere, if I was to leeward, and then bending a little, she seized up the sides of her apparel with both hands, began to jerk it in a violent and disorderly manner this way and that, threw her magnificent head back and skipped furiously away on an Irish jig step, all excitement, wild hilarity, distracted costume, frenzied motion! a spectacle to sear the eyeballs and astonish the soul of a hermit! ~Mark Twain (unconfirmed) or possibly Donn Piatt, c.1870s  [Further reading: TwainQuotes.com — Thanks, Barbara Schmidt!]


The pursuit of happiness: skipping is your best chance of catching it. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Skipping is inner joy meets outer joy. ~Jessi Lane Adams


If I were a doctor, skipping would be my number one prescription. ~Jessi Lane Adams


If movement was a language, skipping would be the natural word for "bliss." ~Theresa "Heartdancer" Carey, courtesy of iSkip.com


Jogging is for those who don't have the guts to skip. ~Terri Guillemets


Skipping gives the adult a well-deserved break and lets the inner child be in charge for a while. ~Opal Montagne


Skipping is just a dancing walk, or if you prefer, a walking dance. ~Jessi Lane Adams


The feeling was elation.... I skip really big and fast. And the amazing thing is, it really cracks me up! I laugh out loud because it is so much fun! And I love to hold my arms out and flap them like a bird.... When I get to the bottom of the trail, I am drenched in sweat and riding high on endorphins from exercise plus laughter. ~Gail, courtesy of iSkip.com


Skipping: the ultimate display of nonconformity. ~Jessi Lane Adams


Restore your sanity — go skipping like crazy! ~Jessi Lane Adams


Why march to the beat of your own drummer when you can skip? ~Dave May, courtesy of iSkip.com


When you take flight by skipping, your baggage gets left behind — there's no room to carry on worries. ~Jessi Lane Adams


When most people see an adult skipping they assume it must be on the way either to or from the asylum. ~Terri Guillemets Acknowledgment:
Many thanks to Kim Corbin of iSkip.com for sharing
some of these wonderful quotes! Skipper Kim is an
enthusiastic advocate for the body, mind, and spirit benefits
of adult skipping. It breaks her heart that the majority of
people in "the land of the free and the home of the brave"
can't let go of worrying about what others might think of
them enough to skip joyfully down the street. Skip on!

R is for Quotes about Reality

Is Reality at the end of this rainbow?  What do you think?

 

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. ~Philip K. Dick


Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. ~Albert Einstein


Are you really sure that a floor can't also be a ceiling? ~M.C. Escher

  Most passport pictures are good likenesses, and it is time we faced it. ~Katharine Brush

 How do we know that the sky is not green and we are all colour-blind? ~Author Unknown

 There are no facts, only interpretations. ~Friedrich Nietzsche


What is reality anyway! It's nothing but a collective hunch. ~Jane Wagner, The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe, 1985, performed by Lily Tomlin


  What was once called the objective world is a sort of Rorschach ink blot, into which each culture, each system of science and religion, each type of personality, reads a meaning only remotely derived from the shape and color of the blot itself. ~Lewis Mumford, "Orientation to Life," The Conduct of Life, 1951


Reality leaves a lot to the imagination. ~John Lennon

 

  Few people have the imagination for reality. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

To treat your facts with imagination is one thing, but to imagine your facts is another. ~John Burroughs

 I have a very firm grasp on reality! I can reach out and strangle it any time! ~Author Unknown

 

Listening to both sides of a story will convince you that there is more to a story than both sides. ~Frank Tyger



Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him? ~Calvin and Hobbes

How reluctantly the mind consents to reality! ~Norman Douglas


   Reality is a palette that humans paint on to let themselves sleep better at night. ~Author Unknown


  I believe in a real, physical world. I figure if the world existed only in my mind, it would pay more attention to me. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


  Everything you can imagine is real. ~Pablo Picasso


  Cloquet hated reality but realized it was still the only place to get a good steak. ~Woody Allen

   Illusion is the first of all pleasures. ~Voltaire

 

Fiction reveals truths that reality obscures. ~Jessamyn West


  Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows. ~Jennifer Yane


  Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it. ~Jane Wagner
 

 

If you have quotes you'd like to add, please do, but only if they're real.

Q is for Quotes about (What else?) Quotations

Life itself is a quotation.  Jorge Luis Borges

A quote is just a tattoo on the tongue.  William F. DeVault

I've compiled a book from the Internet.  It's a book of quotations attributed to the wrong people.  Jerry Seinfeld

He wrapped himself in quotations--as a beggar would enfold himself in the purple of Emperors.  Rudyard Kipling

Proverbs are potted wisdom.  Charles Buxton

Life is like quotations.  Sometimes it makes you laugh.  Sometimes it makes you cry.  Most of the time you just don't get it.  Author Unknown

Now we sit through Shakespeare, in order to recognize the quotations.  Orson Welles

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food.  Arabic Proverb

The proverbs of a nation furnish the index to its spirit and the results of its civilization.  J.G. Holland

People will accept your idea more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.   David Comins

Aphorism:  A concise, clever statement you don't think of until too late.  James A. Thom

It's such a pleasure to write down splendid words--almost as if one were inventing them.  Rupert Hart-Davis

It's a strange world of language where skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.  Franklin P. Jones

Misquotations are the only quotations that are never misquoted. Hesketh Pearson

After all, all he did was string together a lot of old well-known quotations. H.L. Mencken about Shakespeare

Aphorisms are light-towers along the journey of life.  Johnson

He repeated to himself an old French proverb that he had made up that morning.  F. Scott Fitzgerald

P is for Quotes about Procrastination

If you don't have time to read these quotes today, you can always do it tomorrow...or the next day...

 

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. ~Don Marquis


Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday. ~Author Unknown


 The  sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up. ~Author Unknown


If it weren't for the last minute, I wouldn't get anything done. ~Author Unknown


Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment. ~Robert Benchley


  The two rules of procrastination: 1) Do it today. 2) Tomorrow will be today tomorrow. ~Author Unknown


One of the greatest labor-saving inventions of today is tomorrow. ~Vincent T. Foss


  Someday is not a day of the week. ~Author Unknown


 Don't fool yourself that important things can be put off till tomorrow; they can be put off forever, or not at all. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960


Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion. ~C. Northcote Parkinson, 1958


  If you want to make an easy job seem mighty hard, just keep putting off doing it. ~Olin Miller


What may be done at any time will be done at no time. ~Scottish Proverb


There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. ~Joe Ryan


Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. ~Gerald Vaughan


I've been looking over the list of spring chores I made up last fall, and darned if they aren't fall chores, after all. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


The best way to get something done is to begin. ~Author Unknown


  You know you are getting old when it takes too much effort to procrastinate. ~Author Unknown


I do my work at the same time each day — the last minute. ~Author Unknown


Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. ~Spanish Proverb


  Eventually, time takes care of everything. The trouble with procrastination is that people give up on it too soon. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


  Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. ~Mark Twain


  A year from now you may wish you had started today. ~Karen Lamb


One of these days is none of these days. ~H.G. Bohn

If you have any good procrastination quotes, please leave them in the comments section....maybe next week...maybe whenever.

 

O is for Quotes about Optimism

 

 

 

The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser — in case you thought optimism was dead. ~Robert Brault


Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute. ~Gil Stern


  An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. ~Bill Vaughan

 An optimist is the human personification of spring. ~Susan J. Bissonette


  An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day. ~Irv Kupcinet


 Optimists are nostalgic about the future. ~Chicago Tribune


  An optimist is someone who figures that if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's the bluebird of happiness. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


  The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. ~James Branch Cabell, The Silver Stallion, 1926


 A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are. ~Chauncey Mitchell Depew


 It can be said of optimism that while sometimes mistaken, it is never sadly mistaken. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


 Always borrow money from a pessimist, he doesn't expect to be paid back. ~Author Unknown

 

If you know any great or weird quotes on optimism, feel free to add them in the Comments section.  Have a happy, aka optimistic, day.

N is for Quotes about Nostalgia

 

Longing for the good old days, the bad old days, or just the old days?  Enjoy these quotes about nostalgia.....

 

 
 Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect! ~Owens Lee Pomeroy


If you're yearning for the good old days, just turn off the air conditioning. ~Griff Niblack


People seem to get nostalgic about a lot of things they weren't so crazy about the first time around. ~Author Unknown


It's never safe to be nostalgic about something until you're absolutely certain there's no chance of its coming back. ~Bill Vaughn


The world is full of people whose notion of a satisfactory future is, in fact, a return to the idealized past. ~Robertson Davies, A Voice from the Attic


  Nostalgia is a file that removes the rough edges from the good old days. ~Doug Larson


Things ain't what they used to be and probably never was. ~Will Rogers


Nostalgia is a seductive liar. ~George Wildman Ball


  Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory. ~Franklin Pierce Adams


 

Feel nostalgic about the way things used to be?  Tell us about it in the Comments section.

M is for Quotes about Math

 

 

If people do not believe that mathematics is simple, it is only because they do not realize how complicated life is.  ~John Louis von Neumann


Arithmetic is where the answer is right and everything is nice and you can look out of the window and see the blue sky - or the answer is wrong and you have to start over and try again and see how it comes out this time.  ~Carl Sandburg


  Black holes result from God dividing the universe by zero.  ~Author Unknown


  I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.  ~Calvin Trillin

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.  ~Phil Pastoret


  It is a mathematical fact that fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class.  ~Author Unknown

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.  ~Author Unknown

 Arithmetic is where numbers fly like pigeons in and out of your head.  ~Carl Sandburg, "Arithmetic"

 If equations are trains threading the landscape of numbers, then no train stops at pi.  ~Richard Preston

  Trigonometry is a sine of the times.  ~Author Unknown

  A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. ~Paul Erdos


 Sometimes it is useful to know how large your zero is.  ~Author Unknown


The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.  ~Eric Hoffer, Reflections On The Human Condition


 How many times can you subtract 7 from 83, and what is left afterwards?  You can subtract it as many times as you want, and it leaves 76 every time.  ~Author Unknown


  You may be an engineer if your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place.  ~Author Unknown


 The four different branches of Arithmetic - Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.  ~Lewis Carroll

 Infinity is a floorless room without walls or ceiling.  ~Author Unknown


  In the binary system we count on our fists instead of on our fingers.  ~Author Unknown


There are 10 types of people in this world:  those who understand binary and those who don't.  ~Author Unknown


  A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars.  That's subtraction.  ~Mae West 

L is for Quotes about Lemons...and What to Do if Life Gives you Some

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.  Cathy Guinusewine

When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.  Bill Waterson

When life gives you lemons, give them to me.  I love lemons.  Unknown

When life gives you lemons, ask why not limes?  Unknown

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.. and try to find someone whose life gives them vodka, and have a party.  Ron White

You may be given a load of sour lemons, why not try to make a dozen lemon meringue pies?  Maya Angelou

When life gives you lemons, invite your friends and ask them to bring salt and tequila Unknown

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice and sit back and watch the world ask how you did it.  Tori Truax

If you have some great lemon quotes, feel free to add them below.  One can never have too many quotes.

K is for Quotes about Kissing

Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves. ~Albert Einstein


A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know. ~Mistinguett (Jeanne Bourgeois), Theatre Arts, December 1955


  Kissing is a means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other. ~Rene Yasenek


 A  kiss that speaks volumes is seldom a first edition. ~Clare Whiting


I am in favor of preserving the French habit of kissing ladies' hands — after all, one must start somewhere. ~Sacha Guitry


In trying to get our own way, we should remember that kisses are sweeter than whine. ~Author Unknown


Stolen kisses require an accomplice. ~Just One Fool Thing After Another: A Cowfolks' Guide to Romance


The sound of a kiss is not so loud as that of a cannon, but its echo lasts a great deal longer. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Professor at the Breakfast-Table


 It takes a lot of experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner. ~Ladies Home Journal, 1948 I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up. ~Barbara Bush


 

J ia for Quotes about Jewelry

 Jewelry takes people's minds off your wrinkles.  ~Sonja Henie


  I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself.  ~Mae West


  I never worry about diets.  The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.  ~Mae West


 Don't ever wear artistic jewelry; it wrecks a woman's reputation.  ~Colette, Gigi, 1944, translated


No gold-digging for me; I take diamonds!  We may be off the gold standard someday.  ~Mae West


This diamond has so many carats it's almost a turnip.  ~Richard Burton

 I really think that American gentlemen are the best after all, because kissing your hand may make you feel very very good but a diamond and a sapphire bracelet lasts forever.  ~Anita Loos


  My husband gave me a necklace.  It's fake.  I requested fake.  Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.  ~Rita Rudner

 Diamonds are only chunks of coal,
That stuck to their jobs, you see.
~Minnie Richard Smith, "Stick to Your Job"

  I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage.  They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.  ~Rita Rudner


  Not on one strand are all life's jewels strung.  ~William Morris


  When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure.  ~Peter Marshall


  There are three things extremely hard:  steel, a diamond, and to know one's self.  ~Benjamin Franklin


Proverbs are mental gems gathered in the diamond districts of the mind.  ~William R. Alger


  All art is autobiographical; the pearl is the oyster's autobiography.  ~Federico Fellini

 

I is for quotes about the Internet

The Internet is the world's largest library. It's just that all the books are on the floor. ~John Allen Paulos

 The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom. ~Jon Stewart

 Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. ~Mitch Kapor, variation of a quote by Jerome Weisner (Getting an education from MIT is like taking a drink from a fire hose.)


  Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. ~Author Unknown


 Looking at the proliferation of personal web pages on the Net, it looks like very soon everyone on Earth will have 15 megabytes of fame. ~M.G. Sriram


A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click. ~Author Unknown


  The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. ~Andrew Brown

   Information on the Internet is subject to the same rules and regulations as conversation at a bar. ~George Lundberg


  We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true. ~Robert Wilensky, 1996


  The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. ~Dave Barry


What do you call a doctor that fixes websites? A URLologist. ~Author Unknown

  Laying in bed this morning contemplating how amazing it would be if somehow Oscar Wilde and Mae West could twitter from the grave. ~Dita Von Teese


  On Twitter we get excited if someone follows us. In real life we get really scared and run away. ~Author Unknown


  The greatest thing about the internet is that you can quote something and just totally make up the source. ~Benjamin Franklin


 When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the World Wide Web.... Now even my cat has its own page. ~Bill Clinton, 1996


 A blog is a message in a bottle, both in purpose and likely readership. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


  There are three kinds of death in this world. There's heart death, there's brain death, and there's being off the network. ~Guy Almes


 YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook, are merging. The new program will be called YouTwitFace. ~Author Unknown


Internet users are flocking to the Vatican's new website (so they say). It turns out though, that most visitors are there to confess after visiting the Cindy Crawford site. Now, the faithful don't have to kiss the Pope's ring — you just double click on it. ~Author Unknown


If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check. ~Dan Quayle, attributed


 A blogger is an average person who happens to have a need to count his friends every half hour. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


The Internet is the trailer park for the soul. ~Marilyn Manson


 

H is for quotes that make you say, "How true!"

If an article is attractive, or useful, or inexpensive, they'll stop making it tomorrow; if it's all three, they stopped making it yesterday. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960


Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure. ~Murphy's Law


  How is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person? ~François VI de la Rochefoucault


The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. ~Erma Bombeck


  A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist. ~Franklin P. Jones

 An unwatched pot boils immediately. ~H.F. Ellis


  Anything you lose automatically doubles in value. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966


  Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics. ~Author Unknown


Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. ~Author Unknown


 The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance. ~Author Unknown


It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. ~Author Unknown 

People who snore always fall asleep first. ~Author Unknown

 The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. ~Author Unknown


The trouble with, "A place for everything and everything in its place" is that there's always more everything than places. ~Robert Brault,


  It's annoying to be disapproved of by people who know only half the story, especially when you're not sure which half they know. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com

G is for Quotes about Gossip

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.  ~Alice Roosevelt Longworth


  What is told in the ear of a man is often heard 100 miles away.  ~Chinese Proverb


 No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.  ~Bertrand Arthur William Russell, On Education, 1926


  When you are in trouble, people who call to sympathize are really looking for the particulars.  ~Edgar Watson Howe, Country Town Sayings, 1911


The easiest way to keep a secret is without help.  ~Author Unknown


The Puritan's idea of hell is a place where everybody has to mind his own business.  ~Wendell Phillips, attributed


Do not repeat anything you will not sign your name to.  ~Author Unknown


Show me someone who never gossips, and I'll show you someone who isn't interested in people.  ~Barbara Walters


Gossip needn't be false to be evil - there's a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around.  ~Frank A. Clark


It is one of my sources of happiness never to desire a knowledge of other people's business.  ~Dolley Madison


I It isn't what they say about you, it's what they whisper.  ~Errol Flynn


 Trying to squash a rumor is like trying to unring a bell.  ~Shana Alexander


  A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.  ~John Tudor


The biggest liar in the world is They Say.  ~Douglas Malloch


Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.  ~Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanack, July 1735


There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world, and the worst of it is that half of them are true.  ~Winston Churchill

 

F is for Quotes about Food (Are you hungry already?)

 High-tech tomatoes. Mysterious milk. Supersquash. Are we supposed to eat this stuff? Or is it going to eat us? ~Annita Manning

Those who forget the pasta are condemned to reheat it. ~Author Unknown  

 The bagel, an unsweetened doughnut with rigor mortis. ~Beatrice & Ira Freeman

 You can say this for ready-mixes — the next generation isn't going to have any trouble making pies exactly like mother used to make. ~Earl Wilson

 Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first. ~Josh Billings

 A bagel is a doughnut with the sin removed. ~George Rosenbaum

 Anybody who believes that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach flunked geography. ~Robert Byrne

 It's bizarre that the produce manager is more important to my children's health than the pediatrician. ~Meryl Streep

 Worries go down better with soup. ~Jewish Proverb

 Food is an important part of a balanced diet. ~Fran Lebowitz, Metropolitan Life, "Food for Thought and Vice Versa"

 We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons. ~Alfred E. Newman

 If God had intended us to follow recipes,
He wouldn't have given us grandmothers.
~Linda Henley

  There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won't, and that's a wife who can't cook and will. ~Robert Frost

  Hey yogurt, if you're so cultured, how come I never see you at the opera? ~Attributed to Stephen Colbert

 A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. ~James Beard

 You can find your way across this country using burger joints the way a navigator uses stars. ~Charles Kuralt

 Condensed milk is wonderful. I don't see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans. ~Fred Allen

 The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. ~Calvin Trillin

  The story of barbecue is the story of America: Settlers arrive on great unspoiled continent, discover wondrous riches, set them on fire and eat them. ~Vince Staten

 If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry? ~Author Unknown

 Tell me what you eat, I'll tell you who you are. ~Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

 Pre-heat the oven? Really? If I was the sort of person who planned ahead, I wouldn't be eating this Totino's Party Pizza in the first place. ~Adam Peterson

I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good — if it's the pepper or the oni. ~S.A. Sachs

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you're hungry again. ~George Miller

 A converted cannibal is one who, on Friday, eats only fishermen. ~Emily Lotney

Philosophers have often looked for the defining feature of humans — language, rationality, culture, and so on. I'd stick with this: Man is the only animal that likes Tabasco sauce. ~Paul Bloom, How Pleasure Works: The New Science of Why We Like What We Like

 Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing. ~Walt Kelly 

 

 I'll bet what motivated the British to colonize so much of the world is that they were just looking for a decent meal. ~Martha Harrison

 Practice safe eating — always use condiments. ~Author Unknown

 Cheese — milk's leap toward immortality. ~Clifton Fadiman