Thursday, October 14, 2010

Interview with Bernice Bright Dickey, Author of My #1 is Still My #1



First and foremost, how are you and Miriam doing now?

Miriam and I are thriving now where we were only surviving the accident before! She is a fourth grader enjoying her friends and playing soccer.

Are you still working in the school system or are you a full-time minister?

I am in ministry full time now, I do educational consulting for districts as opportunity permits as well as traveling doing speaking engagements and book signings for My #1 Is Still My #1!

You wrote this as a journal during that first hard year after the death of your husband and daughter. What prompted you to publish it?

I was prompted by God to share my grief journey and recovery process with others to inspire them to believe that they can (will come) through their own pain victoriously just like I did. They are not alone, there are answers and they will make it through their crisis.

Tell us about the process you went through to publish.



I self published my book because I wanted to control the content and integrity of the book as God directed me to write it.
It took me five months to develop the manuscript and it was published in three days!


What kinds of feedback have you gotten about the book?

Many who have read the book have shared that they have received a breakthrough in their grief journey and they have been released from the stress of being stuck in their grieving process. They are grateful to know that someone else has gone through tragedies, came through them and lived to talk about it to share with others as an encouragement.

Is there another book in your future?

I have many other testimonies to share of God's Transforming Stories in my life and the lives of others. My family wants me to write about their experiences of loss and devastation as Hurricane Katrina survivors. Ministers and Pastors' wives have asked that I write about our role in ministry with our husbands so that others can really understand what we do for effective ministry to go forth.

Since this is a widows’ site, tell us a little more about the rest of your grief journey. How has it gotten easier over the years?



Initially, I really didn't want to be labeled a widow. If I was a widow that meant I was accepting the fact that my husband was dead and had left me alone to raise our daughter. I didn't want the title because I didn't want to be a single parent. As the years have passed, I realized that the job I was avoiding (being a single parent) was the same job that I was doing very well according to observers. I have finally accepted that I am single and raising my daughter alone (for now) and I've been doing it for quite some time. It hasn't gotten any easier because Miriam is growing up and is going through all of the stages that kids go through. I have decided to be fully present mentally as well as physically in order to help her become all that God has called her to be. He saved her out the accident for a reason and He has trusted me with this special parenting assignment and I will do my very best to make Him proud of His trust in me!


Many bereaved people have some sort of ritual to commemorate the loss. Do you?

Miriam and I celebrate my late husband and daughter's birthdays with cake and ice cream. Our loved ones live in our hearts and we cherish their memories and include them as often as treasured moments allow us to. We acknowledge their spirits in every celebration we share stating that if they could be present physically they would be front and center for us.

I don't commemorate the date of the accident because I choose to focus on their lives rather than the date of their deaths. I do recognize how many years have passed when the date comes around but I choose not to dwell on it.


Thank you for sharing your pain and recovery. Best wishes for the future.

4 comments:

Su said... [Reply to comment]

That was lovely to read. Thank you!

Bernice Bright Dickey said... [Reply to comment]

Thanks for the interview, how can I post the link to your blog on my pages? I didn't see a share button.

Dr. Carolyn Clansy Miller said... [Reply to comment]

Bernice,

Thank you for sharing your journey. You are a tremendous source of inspiration.

Anonymous said... [Reply to comment]

Great interview Bern! It is very comforting for me to see that you are dealing with this and being as strong as you are. I hope to one day follow in your footsteps to overcoming my own grief and you know that is another story all in its self. I love you and stay blessed.
Jenny

 

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